I just stumbled upon a blog,
Living Room Conversations, that shares many ideas with Eating our Way to Civility (it's more general). Great idea! They have a number of great conversation ground rules for constructive conversations which I reproduce below:
Be Curious and Open to Learning
Listen to and be open to hearing all points of view. Maintain an attitude of exploration and learning.
Balance Advocacy and Inquiry
Seek to learn and understand as much as you might want to persuade. Conversation is as much about listening as it is about talking.
Show Respect and Suspend Judgment
Human beings tend to judge one another, do your best not to. Setting judgments aside will enable you to learn from others and contribute to others experiences being respected and appreciated.
Seek Alignment rather than Agreement
Alignment is shared intention, whereas agreement is having a shared belief or opinion. In this conversation, we look for alignment primarily and simply appreciate that we will disagree on some beliefs and opinions.
Be Authentic and Welcome that from Others
Share what’s important to you. Speak authentically; from your personal and heartfelt experience. Be considerate to others who are doing the same.
Be Purposeful and to the Point
Notice if what you are conveying is or is not “on purpose” to the question at hand. Notice if you are making the same point more than once. Do your best to make your point with honesty and depth.
Own and Guide the Conversation
Take responsibility for the quality of your participation and the quality of the conversation by noticing what’s happening and actively support getting yourself and others back “on purpose” when needed.
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